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I got hitched with a pretty boy 3 years ago whom I have befriended for almost 5 years now, over a social networking site. Where did it all start? Friendster, I should say. We connected with a handful of mutual friends we shared. Random inbox messages gradually led to text messages in a year.
School and life got into the way as I was busy growing up as an adolescent. Somewhere in between, I got reconnected via Facebook. A couple of my good friends feasted on him as an eye candy. I couldn't agree more. He was a carbon copy of Enrique Iglesias.
At one point, I was on a texting spree with him. My motive of hooking him up with my girlfriend never happened. & I never knew this boy would then be my next loverboy. I have to shamelessly admit that I dated him, without my parents' consent - almost without anyone's consent at all. I loved the adrenaline rush I got. The butterflies that fluttered in my stomach when I am at all near him. I felt rebellious dating my friend's eye candy. As much as I loved it, the tinge of guilty pang never failed to hit me in the face each time I landed my sight on him or even verbally hear his name. You should see my head turn.
Life was a momentary bliss for me. I had an unusual flood of text messages each and every day. Good morning texts to random texts on a busy weekday. Phone calls that led to sleep-deprivation, and rocketing cellphone bill for him. I felt the pinch even though I was never the one to call.
Our dates only consisted of coffee in the evening in Starbucks and random walks around the mall with my good friends, never a movie date or posh dinner on our own or a stroll in Singapore like any other couples. He insists on tagging along while I shop, even in the nearest boutique over at my place as well as to watch over me as I have a game of badminton with my friends in an abandoned playground. Honestly, I wouldn't call it all dating though - because I have never been on my own with him.
I never liked holding hands, and the thought of kissing just drains my soul. I was thankful for the fact that he never reverted my mind into any sexual activities at all. The only physical contact I ever had, would be him holding my hand while I crossed the road. I just, didn't want more. I didn't wanna play silly games.
He did it all in a small portion. We took it slow and steady, because it involved way too much emotions and feelings for me to handle. I saw the commitment he had towards the relationship. We talked this over, and he met my mother. He introduced me to his family as well, and I thought this was indeed a good sign.
We had our ups and downs too. I never suspected him of having an illegal relationship at all ; but just as a precaution, I always had an eye open hoping I'd never get cheated in the name of love. However, life has to go on because of yesterday's mistakes. I'm beginning to think that the inanity might not be worth such a lengthy discussion after all.
I was then dumb, and now duped.
I am definitely not expecting comments, and definitely not sympathy - but I do expect all that hurt to be read and understood by anyone who's reading ; I lost the love I loved the most.
I now welcome you, to Heartbreak City.
-
You've been ignoring me, why?
No, I didn't.
You didn't bother telling me you have a new girlf now.
Well, now you know. It was just recent.
You always said, you'd tell me. That is why I was disappointed. I didn't know you moved on, that fast.
Hmmm.
I bet she offered you whatever I didn't.
Yeah. She did.
What did I not offer, that she did?
Why must I tell you?
I wanna learn from my mistakes? I don't wanna end up being dumped all over again. One heartbreak is enough.
You're not my type. That's why. I didn't feel that you were the right one for me, get it? I hope you can move on, because I did.
You decide to tell me I'm not your type, after 3 years? Alright. I'll buy that. I am tryna move on. I just need time, I suppose.
As for me, I only liked you. Nothing more than that. I know it's 3 years, but it was just a friend-to-friend thing.
You came over to see me, meet and greet my family and friends, and whatsoever for 3 years ; and we were only friends? You gotta be kidding me!
Oh, come on.
No seriously, I have no intention of bugging you. I'm just so curious! I envy you for being able to move on, but I just wanted to know ... it was all fake then?
Something like that. Do you understand? It wasn't just you that I knew at that point. There were many other girls who kept bugging me too.
T'was all fake? The never-ending phone calls and all? Dying to meet-up with me and all?
Maybe I just missed you at that point, but ...
But?
It didn't mean that I wanted to be yours. I drew a line between us already. I'm sorry for everything.
All the pain and hurt has caused enough damage.
You were just not my type.
Well, not your type, but why? & where else did I go wrong?
Just leave it. I don't wanna talk about it anymore. I can only answer up until there. You'll find someone else. You're a good girl. I'm just too bad to be your boyf.
Yeah sure. Be it then. You have a great life ahead. It was indeed a good run, and all the best in your future undertakings alright?
All the best to you too!
Thank you!
-
Yeah, it's over. The game's over.
School and life got into the way as I was busy growing up as an adolescent. Somewhere in between, I got reconnected via Facebook. A couple of my good friends feasted on him as an eye candy. I couldn't agree more. He was a carbon copy of Enrique Iglesias.
At one point, I was on a texting spree with him. My motive of hooking him up with my girlfriend never happened. & I never knew this boy would then be my next loverboy. I have to shamelessly admit that I dated him, without my parents' consent - almost without anyone's consent at all. I loved the adrenaline rush I got. The butterflies that fluttered in my stomach when I am at all near him. I felt rebellious dating my friend's eye candy. As much as I loved it, the tinge of guilty pang never failed to hit me in the face each time I landed my sight on him or even verbally hear his name. You should see my head turn.
Life was a momentary bliss for me. I had an unusual flood of text messages each and every day. Good morning texts to random texts on a busy weekday. Phone calls that led to sleep-deprivation, and rocketing cellphone bill for him. I felt the pinch even though I was never the one to call.
Our dates only consisted of coffee in the evening in Starbucks and random walks around the mall with my good friends, never a movie date or posh dinner on our own or a stroll in Singapore like any other couples. He insists on tagging along while I shop, even in the nearest boutique over at my place as well as to watch over me as I have a game of badminton with my friends in an abandoned playground. Honestly, I wouldn't call it all dating though - because I have never been on my own with him.
I never liked holding hands, and the thought of kissing just drains my soul. I was thankful for the fact that he never reverted my mind into any sexual activities at all. The only physical contact I ever had, would be him holding my hand while I crossed the road. I just, didn't want more. I didn't wanna play silly games.
He did it all in a small portion. We took it slow and steady, because it involved way too much emotions and feelings for me to handle. I saw the commitment he had towards the relationship. We talked this over, and he met my mother. He introduced me to his family as well, and I thought this was indeed a good sign.
We had our ups and downs too. I never suspected him of having an illegal relationship at all ; but just as a precaution, I always had an eye open hoping I'd never get cheated in the name of love. However, life has to go on because of yesterday's mistakes. I'm beginning to think that the inanity might not be worth such a lengthy discussion after all.
I was then dumb, and now duped.
I am definitely not expecting comments, and definitely not sympathy - but I do expect all that hurt to be read and understood by anyone who's reading ; I lost the love I loved the most.
I now welcome you, to Heartbreak City.
-
You've been ignoring me, why?
No, I didn't.
You didn't bother telling me you have a new girlf now.
Well, now you know. It was just recent.
You always said, you'd tell me. That is why I was disappointed. I didn't know you moved on, that fast.
Hmmm.
I bet she offered you whatever I didn't.
Yeah. She did.
What did I not offer, that she did?
Why must I tell you?
I wanna learn from my mistakes? I don't wanna end up being dumped all over again. One heartbreak is enough.
You're not my type. That's why. I didn't feel that you were the right one for me, get it? I hope you can move on, because I did.
You decide to tell me I'm not your type, after 3 years? Alright. I'll buy that. I am tryna move on. I just need time, I suppose.
As for me, I only liked you. Nothing more than that. I know it's 3 years, but it was just a friend-to-friend thing.
You came over to see me, meet and greet my family and friends, and whatsoever for 3 years ; and we were only friends? You gotta be kidding me!
Oh, come on.
No seriously, I have no intention of bugging you. I'm just so curious! I envy you for being able to move on, but I just wanted to know ... it was all fake then?
Something like that. Do you understand? It wasn't just you that I knew at that point. There were many other girls who kept bugging me too.
T'was all fake? The never-ending phone calls and all? Dying to meet-up with me and all?
Maybe I just missed you at that point, but ...
But?
It didn't mean that I wanted to be yours. I drew a line between us already. I'm sorry for everything.
All the pain and hurt has caused enough damage.
You were just not my type.
Well, not your type, but why? & where else did I go wrong?
Just leave it. I don't wanna talk about it anymore. I can only answer up until there. You'll find someone else. You're a good girl. I'm just too bad to be your boyf.
Yeah sure. Be it then. You have a great life ahead. It was indeed a good run, and all the best in your future undertakings alright?
All the best to you too!
Thank you!
-
Yeah, it's over. The game's over.
You're not my type.
U MAD?
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